Monday, July 15, 2013

The More Things Change, The More They.....Change

If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.
Lao Tzu


To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.
Winston Churchill
 


It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change.
Charles Darwin
 

Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.
George Bernard Shaw
 



Today, my word is Change.
It's all around me now, in so many different ways. 
My morning reading from my book on the Tao contained this quote; 
"This is the nature of nature. Everything changes and nothing is permanent. Human beings, as part of nature, are subject to the same Tao. Everything we see, touch, and feel is undergoing transitions, just like the clouds in the sky and the stars at night. The nature of our lives is impermanence."

Yes, I am studying the Tao. I am a student of many religions. I'm a spiritual person. I believe in God. I believe in Love, Truth, Honor, Nature. I believe in lots of things but, that's as far as I'm going to go right now because I want this blog to remain somewhat non-controversial for the moment. 
Make no mistake, I am not afraid to express my opinions at all. EVER!
....but after the slew of brutal tweets I endured on twitter after posting something about the NRA, I'd prefer to play it safe ...just for now.

So back to Change.
It seems that true to all quotes change is inevitable and constant.

Some changes are much harder than others.
There are those who say that Death, Divorce and Moving are the three toughest.

I've certainly walked through my share of deaths. First, foremost and most devastating for me, the loss of my father when I was 11.
I endured losing my father all over again when just after my 1st book was published, I found out that my father had not died from a second stroke, like I'd been told. He died from a self-inflicted gunshot wound. 
The where, why and how of how I found this out is very personal and not something I'm prepared to share with the blogosphere just yet, or maybe even ever.

I will tell you this; that I could not get the answers I sought at the time so I hired professionals who went to the LAPD and LA County Coroner for me and pulled all of their records. Minus photos, of course. I had a deep burning need to know exactly what happened and why but I had no need to have the images burned into my brain.

So back to Change...Death is ranked up there as the hardest and I have seen my fair share of it. It is a part of the human experience. It touches us all throughout our lives and eventually will come for each of us. 
That sort of philosophy is easy to spout when one is not walking through a loss but ultimately for me, it is always a great comfort.
More Change; Divorce.
I know way too much about this. I've lived it from every conceivable angle and been through it myself, twice. A fact that I am not at all proud of. 
My first divorce was not what one could call, amicable.
My second divorce was.
Both were incredibly, nearly unendurably sad but time has tempered hurt feelings and ill will. 
Though my first husband, Bo and I have no communication at all. 
Bruce and I do communicate. I think we communicate rather well. I'm damn proud of that. He remains a dear friend and an ally.
The last, hardest change (according to what 'they' say...whomever 'they' are.) is moving.
Golly I've done a lot of moving in the past two decades, From Encino California to Malibu, back to Encino, New York (three different dwellings there), back to LA...Hollywood Hills, Sherman Oaks, Hidden Hills, Valley Village, Calabasas, Tarzana, Studio City and now, this Saturday, I will be leaving LA and moving to a small town in Michigan.
my very own version of Bedford falls.
For me this is a massive change. Its scary as hell but, it is time.

I need a place where I can be at peace and create. Whether that is writing or doing theater or cooking, needle pointing or gardening.
I'm ready to live somewhere that I can have neighbors with casseroles, drive in movies and Dairy Queen.

I'm ready to live somewhere that I don't have to practically kill myself to be a size two or remain looking like I haven't aged past forty.
No smog.
Changing seasons.
Great fishing within walking distance,
and reading on my screened in porch
A tranquil existence I can share with The Boy

and The Husband

I mean The Husband
Sorry Baby..... ;)
Here I hope this photo of my teeth makes up for the Poindexter picture:
Though you could take off the Poindexter look...my teeth were a part of my real face.
So back to this Change business. It seems that I can't do just one life change at at a time. After talking to my girlfriends who have tread the biological waters before me....most especially talking just yesterday my BFF Sandy Peckinpah

It seems that the weepiness, sleeplessness, weight gain in my mid section, slow down of metabolism and my desperate need to keep the thermostat at 68 degrees because I'm always sweaty  add up to the undeniable fact that I am stepping into menopause. 
Its about right. I'm 49 years old.

So I've begun my extensive research and I'm choosing Bio identical Hormone Replacement Therapy. I've found an amazing Dr in Michigan and I'm going to tackle this new phase head on and thoroughly informed.
Not an easy thing to do, might I add. I'm really grateful to have the Internet and all of the access to information but, jeez Louise...there's just so much!
The one thing that all can agree on though is the list of horribles...the symptoms.
I mean get a load of this!!
I only have a few of these symptoms but the list above is scary. There's more too!
Loss of libido being on of things missing from the list above...then again...that might've been difficult for the artist to draw.....


That's NOT one of my problems but it could be and that's just not acceptable to me AT ALL. So, as soon as I'm all settled in my new home, the testing will begin and I will begin treatment. I will definitely share the whole experience with those of you who read this blog and I hope it helps you or someone you love....I hope it helps me!
In the meantime, I'm drinking extra water, taking walks and just trying to be gentle with myself.
I have to tell you though, it helps to have the most supportive, understanding, compassionate and loving man on the planet walking through this with me. He even called the Dr to see if they could get me an appointment sooner (My Dr is booked until November).
I do love my husband. He's a good man.
So, while he is at the forefront of my thoughts right now, I'll share with you one of our favorite poems. We had it read at our wedding ceremony.

This is for you Timothy Clark Busfield

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.








66 comments:

  1. Sounds Idyllic, good luck with the treatment, please post photos of the needlework :)

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  3. Good luck on the move and the change. I love your writing. It is touching and funny. Loved the hubby photo. :)

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  4. Very sweet and funny Melissa! Thank you! I was very, very sorry to hear about your Dad of course! xxoo

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  5. Good Luck with the blog. I have found it to be so much more rewarding than a few characters on Twitter or random thoughts on Facebook. I can hardly say "Hi" in 144 characters.

    I started a blog when my life was out of control with my son. I say it unashamed, it saved my life. I thought I was going to go crazy. I hope your blog is as good for you as mine is for me. Mine dealt with parenting an addict. www.parentsofanaddict.blogspot.com

    Anxious to see how your blog develops. Keep writing. I like what I have read so far.

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  6. Oh Melissa Menopause is a very hard thing to pass through. I started at 45 and just ended (I am 55). I did it with NO Hormones.....It really is the best to have a great support system (hubby, kids, even a blog) let it all out and you will feel a little better. One great thing about Michigan....in the dead of winter nothing feels better during a hotflash then just simply walking out in the snow!
    Michiganders welcome you. It is very peaceful here. Since I am a transplant from Oregon(at 43 I came for Hubbys work) . I know somewhat how you feel.... Just breath we are here for you
    Julie
    Boolie
    Preservid

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  7. Welcome to the bloggosphere. I hope that you find it to be as friendly, welcoming, and supportive a place as I have. Good luck with the move. You have the best people making it with you. All will be well.
    Sending light, strength, and patience,
    BettyRants

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  8. Melissa, I'm so sorry that you discovered such a sad truth about your dad's death so many years after, having always believed something else as the cause. Thank you for sharing that with us. Michigan sounds idyllic. I live in England, and love having ever changing seasons. Sounds like you have a wonderful husband - and doctor too! Look forward to your updates, all the best to you. XO

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  9. Another fun blog! Thank you Melissa. I am the same age and have been menopauseing for a couple years now. Oh the hot flashes....your own personal summer. ;) Enjoying your writing and humor and looking forward to much more. :D

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  10. As someone who began menopause at the age of 38 (surgery) and has been out of it for 9 years now, please allow me to tell you a secret: it's only a transition, exactly like puberty but in reverse. It is not an arrival and it will pass in its own good time, depending on if you choose to go on HRT. I did not and I'll never be sorry, but to each her own free will. :) I avoided hot flashes by taking vitamin E. But it's only a passage into a wonderful time of life. I'm turning 62 in September and I feel in my 30s again. All good thoughts to you!

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    1. I totaly agree with you about menopause do'nt worry Melissa

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  11. An excellent blog. Melissa, have no fear, you are really good at blogging. Please share your opinions and views -- that's how we all learn and grow even when we do not agree. Thank you for your insight and willingness to share.

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  12. Hi Melissa, i just purchased your book to read on my tablet. I'm really enjoying it. Im on chapter 24, so far. I have found myself laughing and crying with you. I also want to tell you that my mom was a huge Little House fan. When she passed away, she left the poem "Remember Me" in her Bible. My father was so touched by it. I typed it on a blank business card to put in his wallet, So when my father passed away on New Years Eve 2012, I had the "Remember Me" poem, put on the funeral service program. You have left such a lasting impression on my whole family. I love to watch Little House, on both tne Hallmark chanel and INSP, I have always been so amazed at your acting skills at such a young age! You are truly gifted. Thank you for making such a legacy for my family. Sincerely, Leslie Jean

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  13. Menopause is brutal. I am about half way through it and have tried just about everything. All I can say is it isn't easy, it's different for everyone and I wish you well.
    Good luck on your move - I think it's great!! I've lived my whole life in the Midwest and could not imagine it any other way! LA and NY are great places to visit but, I prefer the peaceful, beautiful, simple life of living in the Midwest. Give yourself some time to adjust and I think you'll love it too! Keep blogging - I am looking forward to your posts. Safe travels!

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  14. I cried reading this. Menopause was, and continues to be, a great struggle for me. Thank you for sharing.

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  15. Yeah, i get to have a hysterectomy next month!

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  17. First, a change quote you may like at this stage of the ballgame (GoTigers)...
    “The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn and feel and change and grow and love and live...Love is life. And if you miss love, you miss life.” Leo Buscaglia
    Next, I've been a Neruda devotee since I became acquainted with him in High School and then studied his work in earnest in College many(I won't disclose how many 'manys' I should be using here!)years ago.
    Your use of his Manana:XVII for your wedding seems perfect! I'm sure you've read it, but his poem XIV from 20 Love Poems and a Song of Despair is a special favorite of mine...
    "I want to do with you what spring does with the cherry trees." :)
    Hang on, once you get the hormone thing straightened out you will be good to go!

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  18. Your move is exciting! People in the Midwest are so friendly and real! Congrats on a new adventure.

    We are about the same age and I was going through hot flashes galore and night sweats. I found that wine was the big culprit for me, and coffee is also a trigger. Once I stopped drinking wine, the hot flashes tapered off to almost nothing.

    The weight gain around the middle is sooo annoying. Doing a good cleanse, like Isagenix got the 12 pounds that I gained right off! Toxins accumulate in the fat around the middle to keep them from the organs. Once the toxins are cleaned out, voila! The fat can be released.

    Also, I am reading your memoir, (awesome by the way!) and we will be discussing tonight at my book club in Encino. 7 pm at The Red Room if you want to pop in. :-) xxx

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  19. I'm so sorry about your father. I'm glad you have a loving family to support you.

    I look forward to your blogging the Michigan winter and am curious about your menopause treatment. I hope it's a safe, natural remedy.

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  20. Welcome to Michigan!! I live just down the road from your "Bedford Falls," although we are planning a move (back) to East Lansing soon. Michigan is a great place to live and I think you will LOVE it! The winters really aren't that bad... But that menopause graphic is. Yikes! I like your plan for dealing with it.

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  21. Melissa I am psyched we could be neighbors! I live in Fowlerville just W of Howell. What a great asset you would be to our county. Michigan is beautiful state! I have traveled all over and never could leave this place (well, maybe a few months down south in winter) :) Welcome, welcome! Barb in Fowlerville

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  22. Welcome to my hometown! I hope people here respect your privacy and you come to enjoy the small town feel. It is a good place to be!

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  23. Melissa, I live in Brighton, the next town to the east of Howell. You will love Howell and Brighton both. You will be here in time for Howell's famous Melon Festival. Welcome to MI!

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  24. Welcome to Michigan, Melissa. Today I live in Howell and have been here for 17 years. Tomorrow we list our log home on 7 acres with pond with bass, blue gill, catfish, koi, and turtles. We don't have the screened in porch but it is covered and easily converted! We have a wrap-around deck overlooking the pond and two dog kennels. Our shepherd and sheltie love to swim. I paddle board on the pond. We are 3 miles from town. I always swore that when it was time to leave, someone who saw the same peaceful qualities and serenity that I did would be the one to love it. I could not resist sharing it with you because that person could be you. It would be a boy's dream. A 14 year old walked in here last week visiting from Kentucky and said he wanted to move in.

    I love Howell and Michigan and hope you do, too.

    Judy

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  25. Welcome to Michigan! You will find Midwesterners to be very welcoming and down to earth. I live in a small town 6 miles south of where you are going to be. You are moving to primarily a farming community...peaceful, quiet, friendly, and sometimes a bit far from conveniences. It will take some adjusting but in the end it is a wonderful life! There is a farm about 5 miles north of the downtown that planted acres of sunflowers. I drove past the other day taking the dogs to the groomer and they were just beautiful...need to go back with my camera. Sundays is the farmer's market with lots of local produce. Fridays in the summer are Concerts on the Courthouse lawn (right next to that Dairy Queen you were looking for!). Change is inevitable but the process/outcome really is dependent on our attitude going through it. May the move be everything you are looking for!

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  26. Welcome to Michigan!! I agree with the above comments, you will find the people real and down to earth. We live on the west side of the state, in Grand Haven, on the shores of Lake Michigan. It is also a wonderful vacation spot, the beautiful beaches,shops, many ice cream places, and beautiful sunsets bring people here to experience our summers. Just to let you know of a nice little vacation spot. May your move to Michigan be all you hope for! We'll be proud to call you a Michigander! Oh and the photo of your screened in porch is wonderful...a great place to read, to have coffee in the morning and to sit and ponder.

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  27. Welcome to Michigan. The first comment mentioned needlework. Do you stitch? I work at MSU where we have a collection of over 800 quilts. Come and visit sometime. I'm next to the football stadium. I'm sure Tim knows how to get there : )

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  28. Welcome to Michigan Melissa! This is where I keep coming back to after living in 9 other states including sunny California. The winters here are really not as bad as you might think as we don't have the lake effect snow in the metro Detroit area. Howell is so quaint and you will find Michiganders to be very warm, friendly and kind. I have five children and couldn't imagine raising them anywhere else. Visit downtown Brighton, Plymouth, Northville and Milford, fabulous cuisine and great shops. Congratulations on your marriage and new beginnings here. Change is good!

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  29. This brings tears to my eyes. We, too, will be moving to Howell. You, as Laura Ingalls, were my childhood idol. I spent an entire summer in a floor-length prairie dress that my grandma made, while my mom followed me around outside playing the role of Mary. Because of your awesome work making that child come alive you became one of my favorite actresses. I will still pause on a made-for-cable movie and watch it if you are the star of it. I especially love that you have always appeared to be a very down-to-earth person who doesn't let fame and stardom take over. Welcome to Michigan!

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  30. Welcome to Michigan! I just read about your move in our local paper. I too, am in the area in Brighton. We moved here 10 years ago, and are very happy that we did. I think you will really like it here. It really is the best of both worlds where we live. We get to enjoy all the comes with living in a small town, but are still within in driving distance of the city. You will find that there is a lot to see and do in the local area, and this is a great time for festivals. This month there is the Art and Music Festival in Brighton, and The Melon Fest in Howell. Another great time that will coming up in October is The Legend of Sleepy Howell. I am sure that it wont take long before you feel this area feels like home.

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  31. I traveled through the hot tunnel of menopause and made it out the other side :-) Oh, I still get the occasional hot flash or night sweats but, I never considered it a bad thing, this Change Of Life. Just another experience along the path of living, fun and not so fun though it be. My son & DIL live in MI. I'll drop off a casserole when I visit them ;-)

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  32. Welcome to Howell Melissa and family. I am sure you will find the small town charm here that you were looking for. We have wonderful festivals, community theaters, friendly people and less than an hour from Detroit, Ann Arbor and Lansing when you need to get your shopping fix ;) Be sure to check out Melonfest and the Fantasy of Lights Parade! I hope you get lots of reading done in your new sunroom, and don't worry, the winters aren't THAT bad !!

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  33. Welcome, all of your family, and a special welcome back for your husband who, no surprise to me, has never lost the Michigan blood. Howell is a truly good hearted town, with caring citizens and the potential for a lovely existence for you here. It will surely require a number of "adjustments" to some things that will seem very different from life in LA, but living in Howell will be no less valuable and in time will hopefully be seen as every bit as full as the life you enjoyed in California. Just quieter here, with less traffic, neon, and demands for perfection! But it's a life ripe for the choosing with the important stuff. Our family settled here in 1977, relocating from a busier Detroit suburb, Southfield. We love it here in Michigan and we hope you all will, too, and that you'll want to spend much of your free time here. Best of luck!

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  34. Welcome to Blogland! You seem to be "settled" and doing great. On my blog I have a series I wrote about "Changing Directions and Surviving Trauma." http://myeclecticloft.blogspot.com/p/changing-directions-surviving-trauma.html Just take time to enjoy the now. Rest and be yourself. Have a wonderful evening.

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  35. Yes change can be scary and you seem to be handling it very well. What's empowering is our perception of that change. I look foward to reading more of your musings Melissa.

    Michael Burkey

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  36. Welcome to PURE MI, Melissa and Tim. We moved here 2.5 years ago from Indiana and never looked back. We love Brighton, small town next to Howell. You will love the people and the community, and we will love and support you back. WELCOME.

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  37. Welcome to Michigan. I know you're going to love it here as much as I do!

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  38. Hey! Welcome to Michigan! I hear a great restaurant, Root, is opening in the old Howell theater sometime soonish. Pretty exciting! I live in tiny Holt...we moved her from northern Nevada and it was scary, but people are super nice around here and autumn is amazing here!

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  39. Welcome to Michigan! If you would like to check out some smaller small towns, try a trip up to the Thumb area! Lots of history, friendly people, farmers' markets almost every day in different towns, lots of festivals, and of course 80 miles of shoreline so that means lots of chances to fish! And....we are only approx 2 hrs north of Howell/Brighton! (I travel there all the time to visit family & friends). If you would like to see the Thumb from a native Michigander's point of view............let me know! :)

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  40. Welcome to The Mitten, where you can show where you live right on your hand. When you get a chance, check out Sweetie-Licious Bakery in another tiny town, DeWitt, not too far from where you are. Fabulous baked goodies. But also beautiful, delicious (and local!) sandwiches and salads. My family and I moved to Michigan five years ago, and love it here. And we'll happily stay if I can find a job now that I'm done with grad school... :-)

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  41. Hi Melissa, I don't know you, but I'm a lifelong resident of Michigan and want to welcome you to our great state. Howell is a great place to live, and a particularly excellent location as it's not far from Lansing (state capital and home of Michigan State) and Ann Arbor (cultural hub and home of UofM).

    There is so much our state has to offer, and I hope you enjoy your life here!

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  42. Welcome! I think you'll find the pace and life a good mix. I've lived many places (LA area included) and can't really imagine not living in MI. I can travel if I want big city or warm winters. People are great, the land itself is beautiful and diverse, and frankly the seasons can't be beat (all of them). You're in a nice part of the mitten...just country enough but close to cities...and easy routes north, south, east and west. Enjoy your time... Oh, the E. Lansing Folk Festival is this coming weekend... very cool, very fun, and great people watching.

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  43. Just wanted to say Welcome to Michigan! We are very excited to have you! Winters can seem a bit "Little House on the Prairie" but they are beautiful, as long as your sitting by the fireplace looking out at it. Anyway, I hope you feel at home very soon :)

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  44. Welcome to Michigan! My friend Lauren, whom I long ago dubbed "Lauren Ingalls Stein", recently renovated a house in downtown Birmingham, Michigan from the 1860's. She writes a very popular blog about slowing down and enjoying life (http://howbourgeois.blogspot.com/2013/07/slow-down-four-most-awesome-and.html), which is really what Michigan is all about. Enjoy finding out what it is that makes all of us so nuts for this place!

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  45. As with everyone else, I would like to say, Welcome to Michigan to you and your whole family. There are plenty of things to do to keep you all busy, or just sit back and relax. A few have mentioned that Jeff Daniels is from Chelsea... well he founded The Purple Rose theater. It is a great place to see a fantastic play with many awesome actors and actresses. And you don't get all of the hoopla of going downtown Detroit. It is a very charming town and very laid back. Mackinaw Island is a MUST SEE. Though I am not sure why we are all giving you this advice. Since Tim is from Lansing, if he grew up here he knows all of the great things this state has to offer.

    Welcome and I hope you guys have a wonderful life here! :)

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  46. Welcome to the mitten! I've lived in Allegan (pop. 5,000-ish) for all but 10 of my 64 years.
    I also started blogging about life in general - much of it specifically about Allegan.
    http://ellenalive.blogspot.com/

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  47. Just now found your blog. You have expressed your feelings very well. I'm praying that your home life here in MI and in Howell in particular is very enjoyable for you and spiritually beneficial. On a day when you are thinking of something to do, take a short trip to Lowell and stop in. The coffee is on.

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  48. Welcome, Melissa and Tim. I grew up in Michigan, in Warren, north of Detroit, went to Michigan State, where I met my hubby, and after college, moved to Indiana, back in '76. I'm not too far from my home state, but I have to say that I still get a thrill, driving north on the interstate, seeing that blue "Pure Michigan" sign. There are alot of challenges to living in Michigan: the economy, the dependency on tourism and the auto industry, etc. But the charm of living in the mitten, with the straight-talking, loyal, loving people there is just so worth it. Not to mention the beautiful seasons, the wonderful lakeshore surrounding the state, the ambience, the mitten itself, the upper peninsula with it's own unique characteristics....all of this will hopefully touch your heart as well, and will help Michigan become home to you quickly. Bless your new home, bless your new marriage, and your dear son, as he adjusts to life in a whole new place with a whole new style. If you're ever in northern Indiana, I'd love to show you around. Welcome! Barb Bussell, artist and imaginer, Warsaw, IN (www.barbzie.com)

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  50. Hi Melissa: Please let me chime in here and add my welcome to Michigan and congratulations on your marriage! I do not live in Howell, but I teach at Highlander Way Middle School in Howell. By the sound of your tweets, you are settling in and getting to know the area. As others have pointed out, there are many, many great things to do and see and experience here in Michigan and, as a transplanted Michigander myself, I can honestly say I love it here and hope you do as well! I have personally already walked through that menopause thing and can tell you that it will get better!  I am so sorry that the weather these past few weeks has been so yucky! It truly is not a typical summer for us. We’ve had way more rain than I can remember in many years and I swear we really do see the sun way more than it has shown its pretty face in the past few weeks. Someone told me many years ago, when I first moved here that if I didn’t like Michigan weather, all I had to do was wait five minutes…it will change! 
    I do not want to be presumptuous, but if you and/or Tim have even an inkling of a desire to be involved with the schools, I teach a class called “Lights, Camera, Screen Education” to 7th and 8th graders and it would be such an honor and so awesome if you would come and share your wealth of knowledge about the whole TV and movie making process with them sometime. I have found that just putting a video camera in their hands engages these kids immediately and the work they do (in spite of the very rudimentary equipment and limited resources we have) is pretty amazing. Here is a link to my website: www.howellschools.com/webpages/ccolburn We even hold a “HAWK” Academy Awards Night at the end of each year, complete with red carpet and “Oscar” type statues for the film winners. The students run the whole show, from writing the ceremony script to serving as host and hostess and presenters. If you have a few minutes, it would be great to have your input. Thank you and I truly do hope you enjoy your new life here!

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  51. Welcome to Michigan. Here, there are many places where you can see the moon, feel the stars, taste the quiet.

    Quietness (from Rumi)

    Inside this new love, die.
    Your way begins on the other side.
    Become the sky.
    Take an axe to the prison wall.
    Escape.
    Walk out like someone suddenly born into color.
    Do it now.
    You're covered with thick cloud.
    Slide out the side. Die,
    and be quiet. Quietness is the surest sign
    that you've died.
    Your old life was a frantic running from silence.

    The speechless full moon
    comes out now.

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    2. That's just beautiful, and a perfect sentiment for this situation. Love it.

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  52. Welcome to Michigan, I moved here 19 years ago for my first job out of graduate school and I love it here! Howell is a decent sized place and close enough to Detroit and Ann Arbor if you want to see a show. We live in a smaller city than that. Don't miss driving up north for the color change this fall. It's a beautiful drive if you get the timing right.

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  53. Welcome to Michigan! I hope you find peace and happiness in your new home. It is a great community.

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  54. Welcome to Howell! I've been doing the menopause thing for 20 years - started at 25. I don't turn the heat on in my house until November if I can help it, much to the chagrin of all of the men/boys in the house (4 of them). I spend many hours enjoying the sights and sounds with some needles, yarn, and wine all around town. I hope your move brings to you what you need. ;-)

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  55. Hope you are getting settled in and your move went smoothly. Please keep us up to date and let us know if you need anything :)

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  56. Thanks for this heart felt post. Death, divorce and moving----you said it all very well! If we did not know pain and sorrow, we would not appreciate or know the fullest extent of joy and happiness. Take good care as you continue to ease into your new home and life. Howell is blessed to have your family in their community.

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  57. I fully appreciate the menopause frustrations as well. I am just starting to go through the perils myself. If you ever want a walking partner or someone to meet for coffee to give you insight on the area, (best this, or best that, etc..), let me know. Welcome to our neck of the woods. :)

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  58. Hello Melissa !

    WELCOME to MICHIGAN ! You & Tim will love Livingston County, Michigan and ALL it HAS to OFFER. I was born at Mcphereson Hospital, grew up in Fowlerville, Michigan, next village West of Howell on I96/Grand River. Worked for A&L PARTS on Michigan Ave/D19 & Mason Road.
    I am SO VERY HAPPY for You & Tim ! If you ever get bored with Howell, come visit Dewitt, Michigan. Quaint Little City North of Lansing, Michigan on Old 27/I-69.
    It would be Nice to See You & Tim.
    Thank You for Listening to Ramble on about Nothing.

    Jeff

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  59. Congratulations on your move.

    I was saddened to read about the death of your father. Suicide is such a hard, hard thing to deal with. Death is hard enough. My little niece took her life about 19 months ago, and it has been the hardest death I've ever gone through. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

    I admire your work and find it hard to believe that my favorite childhood actress is the same age I am. I haven't started through menopause yet and am not looking forward to it, so I'll be following your journey to see what I have to look forward to.

    Catherine

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  60. I am late finding your blog, but again, welcome to MI! I've been here my whole life! I live in Marshall, just over an hour away. Marshall is the Historic Home center and the City of Hospitality. If you ever want to see the beauty of turn of the century homes, you need to attend the Marshall Historic Home Tour. It's the first weekend after Labor Day every year.

    It's very heartwarming to me that you would choose our state to make your home. I am a bit older than you but remember watching Little House and loving the simplicity.......not so much the hardship.

    So, if you ever want to see the Marshall historic sights........I'd do what I can to help.

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  61. signing up for notifications.......oops

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